Week 1 Recap

Bloodthirsty Scalping Savages (103) defeat Emerald City Chimps (83)
Rolling Rock Wild Things (117) defeat the Specialists (62)
Ocean Beach Surf Riders (135) defeat Bay City Steamrollers (70)
Rolling Blackouts (101) defeat Richmond Sluts (55)
Chicago Long-Horned Beatles (102) defeat Arcadia Bobcats (83)
Joe’s Mothertuckers (91) defeat Mission Manhandlers (42)

What can be said that hasn’t been said before? Duke lost. Not a shocker. Commish lost; also no surprise. Mr. Fred won in convicing fashion à Now that’s some Fantasy news right there! Bill’s team won. Wait, am I dreaming? Is this a Fantasy or a Nightmare? Kanako almost got doubled up by Joe. Now I know she’s eating for two, so does that mean only half her brain is playing football? Say it ain’t so! Sei lost, but I’m sure he’ll bounce back in usual Sei fashion, utilizing a dazzling array of free agent pick-ups to bolster his Fantasy hubris. Melissa was defeated handily by Ron – perhaps her lack of Commish-assisted-draft has finally caught up to her. Defending champ Glen had the highest point total of the week with 135. Who would’ve thought that 90 year old Curtis Martin could “run” for 196 yards and that Marshall “Disappointing for the Chimps” Faulk would look so spry on route to 128 rushing yards? It had to be the Moi. But could Moi have also been the reason for Vinny throwing for 355 yards? Do his powers really extend that far? Vinny is on Bill’s team, and Bill started Billy Miller at TE instead of Todd Heap and he still won – I think someone has been smoking their own crack, and it’s working.

Two words for the old commish: Quentin Griffin. Do I dare bench Rudi Rudi Rudi for the 5’7” wonder in Denver?

Player of the week: Curtis Martin (Ocean Beach Surf Riders) – 196 yards rushing, 1 rushing td, 3 receptions for 7 yards, 1 receiving TD = 40 points.

Disappointing player of the week: Trent Green (Rolling Blackouts) – 174 passing yards, 0 td’s, 1 int = 2 points. Luckily this didn’t hurt Ron. He had a fine stable of studs to make up the difference (Shawn Alexander – 34, Dominic Davis – 20, Deion Branch – 15, Antonio Gates – 16)

Benched player of the week: Quentin Griffin (EC Chimps - does the old commish dare bench Rudi Rudi Rudi for QG?) – 156 yards rushing, 2 rushing td’s, 1 reception for 1 yard, 1 receiving td = 34 points

Biggest injury of the week: Steve Smith (Richmond Sluts) – Broken leg – out for at least 8 weeks and probably more! Oh the agony. He looked pretty good with 6 catches for 60 yards (9 points) – but that injury was some brutal stuff.

Lowlight of the week: Mission Manhandlers score 42 points in game 1. 17 of those points came from Randy Moss. QB’s plus RB’s scored a grand total of 11 points. The Panthers Defense looked horrible against the Packers and yielded Kanako –1 point! Who would’ve thunk it? Me thinks that Eddie George at running back ain’t going to get the job done this season.

Nominees for COTW this week:
Kanako – for scoring 42 points
Melissa – 55 points, only one player in double figures (Isaac Bruce had 22)
Scott – for watching Quentin Griffin on Sunday and clenching his fists in utter despair!
Duke – he lost, he’s Duke, he has to be nominated
Sei – of his 70 points, Priest Holmes had over half of them (36)

I am going to spare Pete a nomination this week since Monday was his birthday. Otherwise I think this year all COTW nominees will be the losers from that week.

Sorry this recap is so brief, but I’m tired. Perhaps others will post their own recaps or we’ll get some witty repartee going on in the comments section.